Name That Smell!

So I was reading my BFF's blog and Beau had a mystery smell in her laundry room and it brought back some pretty painful memories of my own. So here they are:

It was a little over 7 years ago and I was just pregnant with Cyrus. Now if you have ever been pregnant you sense of smell is heightened to some level as what dogs hear at. It was early morning in the summer and I noticed a smell, it wasn't that bad and was eliminated with the lighting of a candle and opening up a window. So I carried on with my day. The smell kept getting worse as the day wore on and the heat of the day swept in.

Curtis came home for lunch that day and said "whoa, what is that smell" together we spent the next hour looking for the stench. He went back to work and I started to power clean the house determined to find the odor. By the end of the day I could barely stand to be inside with what now has become the stench of what I can only assume is a rotting carcass of some sort.

At 5pm I had all but given up and was just going to move out and find a new place to live. Curtis got home and almost passed out when he walked in the front door. I was sitting outside and figured this was no doubt some how his fault and he could deal with it. So here we are again, looking for the stench.

On a small table in the kitchen next to my tiny deepfreeze is a couple of balled up Walmart and Safeway plastic bags, the ones you use for garbage. So Curtis picks them up and further investigates. Under the wad of bags is yet another wad of bags and one of them is leaking some kind of Motor Oil.....weird right.... Yeah well we have indeed found the smell. Turns out that when you take minnows (bait) out the freezer and don't put them back in they tend to rot and turn into a oil of sorts. They had infact taken on a life of their own and were only a day a way from walking themselves to the garbage.

Well now that we had found the smell the next problem was eliminating it. So my cute little table was taken out and we spent the next 3 days with all the windows and doors open trying to rid the left over smell. There was also quite a lot of swearing done by me and a few death threats to Curtis that if he ever, ever brought bait into the house again the smell of HIS rotting carcass would be the problem.

I don't think I will ever forget that smell as long as I live.

So a couple years pass and again we play the name that smell game, Round 2....
everytime I walk into the kitchen it smells funky, around the fridge area. I open the fridge door and peek in, no smell, I close the door and smell it again. It is rank and I can't find where the smell is coming from or what would cause it. I procede to clean out the entire fridge. I take everything out and get the spraynine and give it a well overdue cleaning out. I close the door and I can still smell it.

Well it can't be coming from the fridge so I take everything out of the cupboard near the fridge, I clean out and under the microwave, still the smell eludes me. At this point I am tired and cranky and overwhelming stench is still there. I make Curtis pull out the fridge and I clean under it, put it back and I can still smell it.

I open the fridge and the smell is gone, close the fridge, smell is there....WTF. So I am now getting a bit hungry and we head out to Micky D's for dinner, come back and I open upo the fridge to grab the ketchup out of the door.... Wow found the smell.....In the door where I didn't clean was some black forrest ham from the deli that Curtis had bought who knows when and had forgotten about. So when I walked by the closed fridge I could smell it, but when I opened the door and smelled inside I couldn't. Once I got rid of the ham, I got rid of the smell.

Now you must now be thinking who are these people and why do they live like that? I have no answers for you. I am thinking the same thing. I don't claim to be a housekeeper, but my home is usually tidy. I never worry that when I sit on the sofa I will be sitting on a PB and J sandwhich as well. Yet on these rare occasions something gets by me and it is like I am living in the houses you see on talk shows, you know the ones where the womans house is so horrible you think my God how can people live like that.

Anyway, that is my horrible smell story and I feel for you Beau and anyone else who has suffered the fate of bait left out, or the hamster that escaped and you prayed that it found its way out of your house only to find out days later that in fact it was not so lucky....here's to you!

I am going to have a glass of wine now and try to once again bury those memories....

The Things Kids Say!

Have you ever been out in public and have your children say something so loud and so embarassing that you spend the next 10 minutes trying to find a place to hide and the next 5 minutes looking for their "real" parents....

Well a couple of weeks ago we are at the mall doing a bit of shopping. It was a nice day and we were able to get everything we were looking for. That so seldom happens and on top of it all the kids were so good and well behaved that we thought we would buy them an ice cream on the way out.

So here are ice cream in hand on our way out of the mall, we are laughing and having a great time when off to the side Cyrus my six year old sees something that is worth his undivided attention...

Background, we are from Alberta Canada and don't see a lot of Afganistan Women out and about...

So he spies this lady in a full Burka (I think that is what it is called) she is covered head to toe in all black with all that is showing is a slit for her eyes, it really was quite beautiful...

Enter Cyrus..."look mom a NINJA, a real life NINJA" oh my he was so excited and really loud.
Now you would think that people would have a sense of humor about these things, she was with children, but no.

So I quickly usser him out of the mall, shusshing him all the way, meanwhile, he keeps saying how cool it is that he just seen a real life ninja. Well I could hardly burst his bubble, as we made our way out of earshot of anyone, I agreed that it was very cool, but we should probably keep it a secret between us otherwise his friends would be jealous!

My Life as a Rock Star!

So I went back to Canada and came back with Franks Red Hot Sauce, Cookies and Cream Oatmeal and Ceaser Salad Dressing! It was an amazing trip. I flew into Tokyo and met 2 very wonderful women from Perth. A lovely lady who has a tattoo shop here in town run by all women and a stripper on her way to Vegas to interview for a job at Planet Hollywood! Good Luck to you! So we sat and ate and drank really good beer, once we found it! Which is hard if you don't speak Japanese, however I do know where the phones are at the airport.

So Canada was great, I had so many good laughs it was nice to be back for a bit. So on the flight home, I again find myself in Tokyo with a bit if a wait. So I head on down to the smoking lounge. Yes you can still smoke in the airport in Tokyo! So usually everyone is quiet and tries not to make eye contact, so you don't get stuck hearing someones life story when all you really want to do is relax, be glad your not on a cramped airplane and enjoy your death stick in peace!

So there is a guy there and he is very friendly and he tells me a bit about himself and asks me what I do and where I was coming from and where I am off to. Turns out we are sitting in the same row on the next flight into Perth. He is really nice so I tell him I was just at the Everything To Do With Sex Show in Toronto and that I do home parties for Passion Parties... Well next thing I know he tells me that he is Rick's The drummer from Def Leopards guy, and wouldn't you know the whole band is sitting right there!!!

Wait for it.....

So we get on the flight and I talk with some more people from the band... he asks for my card and if he can get some "goodies" for the band to give to their wives!

So now we land in Perth and I don't get hassled at customs for once and am outside enjoying the fresh air and stretching my legs. And who do I see but Rick and yes I got a picture of us together! We chatted it was nice. Then Tod the "guy" comes out, tells me he will call or email and get in touch. So on Halloween I was picking up VIP tickets for the Def Leopard concert in Perth and handing over some Passion!

So not really a rock star, but pretty frick'n close!!